How Do You Deal With Life’s Disappointments

Over the course of your life you will encounter many  disappointments. Sometimes it will be a loved one who lets you down. Sometimes it will be a work deal or a business meeting that doesn’t go as planned. Other times it will seem as if the whole universe is kicking you in the head just because it can.

If you want to live a happy and fulfilled life you need to learn how to deal with life’s disappointments. 

In this post I am going to talk about a few strategies that you can use next time you feel let down.

Are your expectations realistic?

One of the first things you need to look at when you are feeling disappointed is whether or not your expectations were realistic. I want to tell you something that might sound quite radical:

It is your expectations that create your disappointment. Nothing else.

That’s right. It is your expectations that create the fertile ground for your disappointments to flourish. Although it might seem like your business partner let you down by not coming up with the goods it was, in actual fact, your expectations that led you to believe that this event would not occur.

The next time you feel disappointed by some situation I want you to take a few moments to look into your mind. Examine the situation and start to think about whether or not your expectations were realistic. I think you will find that, in almost all situations, your big disappointments will be caused by unrealistic expectations.

Should I have no expectations?
If you start to realize that your expectations are partly to blame it is natural to then think that perhaps you should have no expectations whatsoever. This is an interesting point that I would like to hear some discussion on as I am not completely sure of the answer myself. Should we have zero expectations or should we just try to be more realistic?

One thing I have noticed over the years is that sometimes my own mind is quite unrealistic when it comes to reacting to disappointment.

Are you looking on the bright side?

The most important point of all when discussing the issue of disappointments is that it provides you with an opportunity to grow. Disappointments are life’s little testers – you can either let them break you down or you can use them as a tool for change.

Now most of us would view this as “wasted time”. We would curse the fact that we spent all those years and didn’t achieve anything. But the Prince moved on to new things. He knew that the time wasn’t wasted because without that work he would never have progressed to the next stage. Without it he would never have become the great man that has changed the lives of hundreds of millions throughout history.

Using disappointment to grow
We need to see disappointment as one step in a series of many that is leading to bigger and better things. If you choose to dwell on disappointment and curse the day that it happened you are going to get stuck. The wise use it as a catalyst for change.

Conclusion

I truly believe that the feeling of being let down by your partner or your Government or your work is a time to grow and change. I also feel that most of the time we ourselves are at least 50% to blame.

The next time you feel disappointed by someone make sure you check to see whether your reaction is justified. Did the person try their best? Did they really mean to hurt you? Is your frustration really necessary? Most of the times the answer is a resounding “no”.